Does it really matter?

I grasp something when May told me about her relationship

“A relationship
Can be there or not also,
It doesn’t matter”

Went back home after training
Think of what she said

hmm
It actually suits me too
Right?

Going Australia on July
Miss * hugs * kiss
Will be forgotten after that I guess?

Since I’m not that important to him
Guess I won’t tell him that I’m going to Aus too

I care
And it bothers me
About what he think and how he feel

But even we get together
Its like noting will change
And it doesn’t matter if we are couple or not
Coz we won't bother at all

He finds me when he needs me
When he had his friends I’ll be waiting
I’m like a ‘xiao nv ren’
And he thinks girl should be like that too

even we are together

we'll still having the same life

doing what we do now

Coz for guys
They want freedom
And for girls
They just want the guy they love to be happy and be with them

But it this really gonna work?
No idea
But usually girls with get hurt I guess?

Think * think * think * think
Still the same
Let it be
And everything will be fine

Anyway
Wish me luck
Hopefully my life in Aus will be different
In a good sense I mean
And my new life will be starting from there

**God bless me**

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Bad luck

Cisi cried that day
She said she’s damn bad luck
My mood went down too

A lot of problems come into her at the same time
Her relationship
Her homework
Her teacher
Don’t have her passports
The dance
Everything around her

She’s strong and brave
But she can accept too much in one time

Suen finds me after I left Cisi’s house
She’s in bad mood also
She can’t let go yet
And his uncle is suffering in cancer

I didn’t give any advice or cheer her up
Feel like crying
Can’t help them at all

Yet I told myself
I’ll try my best and be there for u when u needs me

Had a small argue with ah Soo
Don’t know I’m right or wrong
But the problems still exist
I got my points and he got his points
But how to reduce the problems is the most important thing noh?

TT

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friend

am i the naive one?

or the world is too realistic for us?

good with everyone

thought that they won't be your best friends

thought that you will get what you paid for

thought when you treat a person good

he/she will be too

having a friend that u dun know his/her real act at all

really??

or u just choose not to know it??

i saw things

go through things

notice that they were not there with my other friends

which still study in form 6

keep on changing

and what's the real personality of mine?

do i have one?

knowing too much is not a good thing to do

but u'll be continuing being used

thought that are ur true friends

why world need to be so complicated

why i have to know all of that after i thought i know what kind of person he/she is?

what is a friend really stand for?

Read more

wOo hOo~~

finally

Cisi came back from Beijing de

^^

miss her so damn much

we went for lunch the day after she came back

and

pili pala pili pala

we kept on talking when we met each other

haha

feel like giving her a big big hugs

but didn't coz we were in the car

and i'm very shy

ahahaha

after dinner

we when shopping

bought nail polish and keep playing with the tester

Cisi follow me back home coz my parents went Siam

and she met my friend Suen and Ee

we were tired 

but still we talk and talk and talk

until i almost fall asleep

haha

its good to have her back

really miss her so damn much

haha

JAMIE LOVE CISI

JAMIE LOVE CISI COZ CISI LOVE JAMIE

she use to tell me that

ya

i love her

muackss ^6

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interview

Went Sega for interview few days ago
Now waiting for the call
If we get a call
Means we get a job
And if I dun get a job from Sega
I’ll be going back to Inti to continue my studies
Which is very...
Sweat

Having a very bad mood yesterday
Why?
It might be my studies
Or even him
I don’t know

My mum ask me weather I want to go KL instate of Aus to had my pre-u
Coz my cousin from KL feels like I should go KL first
It saves a lot
I struggled very long
Damn damn bad mood

Everything is a decision
Each decision is so difficult to made
After one decision is made another come
After ones decision is made another choice came
Everything keep repeating and repeating
When will it stop?
Damn tired with my life
But I won’t give up
I can go through all the problems
That’s what I believe in myself

told my mum my decision

but she seem to be not so satisfied

dun feel good but still dun wanna give up wat i had decide

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sleep like a pig

that's how i run away from my problem

without hurting myself

no need to think so much

and sleep as long as possible to let the time pass

it doesn't hurt

that let me stop thinking

which makes me like it so much when something happened

thought i would get rid of him

didn't see him much this days

but why he's in my dream

=="

i trust my friend

but i dun trust him

he's not ur cup of tea

but u might be his cup of tea

yet it doesn't matter to me anymore

he scare lonely

and there is always a person beside him

friend or gal

that's wat i feel

so i said i trust u

i know May recently only

but its nice knowing her

found true friends from the studio

first-Cisi

she's always there when i need her

give me opinion

friendly and good that makes me believe there's still true friends

second-Vera

she's strong

try to be bad but she's good

adorable [haha]

and have her own thinking

third-Ashley

she's always steam but bring us laughter

caring

and she's a good gal too

fourth-May

she cry easily

always laught and make us laught

siao siao de

good listener

fifth-Diana

steam

always get peli from me

first tb i saw which always get hurt

caring and good gal

sixth-Maggie

strong

mature

a nice gal

but i'm not so close with her

maybe

i dunno?

juz felt that she's so higher level than i do

haha

haiz

really bo form

dunno wat to write de

juz stop here la

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political

haiz

we are just a banch of kids that like to play basketball

why can't we just enjoy playing?

that happened 2 years ago

i was new in the team

and my coach "ah yan" taught me for 6 months only

we then have 3 coach join in

they come by themselves and said wanna teach us

coz they saw us very hardworking

and they saw how much we pay for to go for practice

we train hard and all the coach respect each others as well

but there is once

a competition in veldor

that was the final

and we were having our game with JIT SIN

we lost the game by one ball [if i'm not mistaken]

that was the first game that lead us to the campion after our hardwork

the coach of that day is uncle

coz sir has work till very late

he came late

he give opinion for uncle when he saw something wrong

but than uncle have his own way

and didn't accept the advice

but after the game

our captain "ah xuan" were being blame

all berapit said that we lost the game coz she's greedy

sir told uncle not to say that

coz ones game lost is cause by the coach by not the player

even player didn't listen to the order is still the coach's problem

coach should be responsible with players attitude and their performance

uncle left after that

and our captain come back after our advice

i was being hate by my senior after that

coz they felt that i'm very good with sir

and all my teammates hate him actually

coz of his attitude i guess?

but i'm the knid of person that doesn't care much

coz wat i want is to be happy

do wat i wanna do

and i dunno how to reject ppl

i was sir's best player [senior group] and helper

i was once the assistant coach of my high school

and now i'm facing a difficulty of choosing

my senior and a few teammates going to join the competition on june

but the problem is the are under uncle

and they ask me weather i wanna join them or not

i dunno sir got join the game or not

coz its under 21

i was thinking of joining them if sir joining

but wat my senior will think about me

and is my sir joining?

AH~~~

just wanna enjoy and have a game

but why is it so difficult

everything must choose

make a choice

life is so damn hard

TT

diana ask me to join youngster

but

if sir see me in youngster

wat'll he say again??

he hate ppl like that

and dun think about joining uncle

die faster

haiz

i think i should give him a call

conform with him

but i'm scare to join youngster

god bless me

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can't discribe the feeling

那种感觉

代表着什么？

无意间

看到的照片

怎么会让我有酱的反应啊？

看到了他跟meriyean的照片

心里很不舒服

像被千万只针刺一样

好难呼吸

严重

而且还真夸张

是凑巧吗？

可能是自己不舒服吧？

对~~

一定是那样！！

跟他一点关系都没有

那个女生是在他朋友生日的前一天认识的

因为我要载他过槟城时她在他家

没什么去看那个女生

因为对我来说习惯就好

后来才知道她是杨飞的学生

就是之前上去时他们说的那个女生

其实看到她时我有点吓到

因为我到时他在睡觉

那她又在干嘛？

不知道也不想知道

刚刚看了照片才知道

原来她就是在云顶时让我吃醋的女生

哈哈

世界还真小啊

那只是一个巧合

是我自己不舒服

别想太多

我已经不会去在意他所做的一切了

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